What would you say is the thing that makes you feel or come more fully alive?
Are you making sufficient time for that thing, person, event, or class every week?
The things that make me feel or come alive are meaningful relationships, dancing, travel, poetry, fashion and generally expressing the love and joy I feel inside through the external (last month I started singing lessons and the month before that did trapeze school classes).
I’ll focus this sharing on relationships…
I had an experience this weekend that has come to remind the branding gal and success coach in me, what it takes to feel alive and step into greater levels of successful in both life and business:
In short you could say it comes by self-expressing in a way that inspires connection…
This experience came, as most others do, to remind me of our charge every day to consistently do the things that make us feel in true alignment and, to take it a step deeper and further, to share more transparently so we may connect with more and more people as humans first and ~ drum roll ~ as marketers or ego-rich humanoids never.
This sharing was inspired by going to the Oscars this past weekend…
What fun it was to be able to creatively paint my weekend with gorgeous gowns! It’s true… the three days of parties, getting dressed up and being pampered with professional hair and make-up every day felt amazing.
I felt nurtured, beautiful and at peace (whenever I’m having the most fun, I feel peace. If you feel this way too, this our our soul saying “Right on, sister. Keep having WAY more fun, keep moving towards pleasure, comfort in your own skin and being more and more yourself.”).
But by far the most important part about this weekend went way beyond shaking hands with celebrities, going to Ari Emanuel’s house for a party Friday night or to the “it” Vanity Fair party on Sunday where I saw Oprah, Beyoncé and took a photo with Oscar-winner John Legend.
The most important party and the true VIPs were my husband and the two bffs we were with.
What made me feel most alive was sharing the experience with my husband of 14 years (17 years together), one of my best girlfriends from college (we’ve known each other 22) and her sweet husband (known him for about 15 years).
In short, it's true what they say –> it’s all about who you (REALLY) know 😉
And I really, really know them, down deep. I am so grateful.
Your Business, Brand & Home
In the most successful businesses and brands, it’s all about who you deeply know too. How you really take the time to get to know someone, and how you’re communicating with them not TO them.
Are you being human?
Are you being more interested than interesting?
Are you listening, really listening to them?
And, on the flip…at home: are you consistently treating the people that matter most in your life in alignment with what you want to bring into your business — and with what you generally value and believe?
Try this on for size: if you’re not treating your good friends or those at home how you want your business community or potential clients to treat you, it may be a tough trick to land.
Our greatest success and good feelings experienced come from alignment.
Are you treating your husband the way you wish potential clients to treat you or respond to you? Are you giving those who have known you longest in life red-carpet treatment and your "best side” too?
Alignment brings us the right opportunities, people and events, every time, without fail, but we must focus on what's most important.
We can have all the money in the world but I think we would all agree that it doesn't matter very much if we don’t have good, solid relationships (in and outside of our business) to share experiences with.
And most importantly, we can have all the money in the world but if we don't have a good, honest relationship with ourselves first…well, you fill in the blank.
Relationship and relating are key.
Relationships ground us by showing us how much of us there is to love. And when relationships are good, boy do they ever bring us back to ourselves.
That’s what the Oscars came to sing to me…
Energy outputted with one group ends up being the energy received from another.
Personally, I felt my most creative, self-expressed and ALIVE self as a result of the loving people you see above and as a result of the positive, elevated, fun-loving, balanced and abundance-oriented conversation that flowed between the four of us.
Anything is possible was the feeling behind it all…
I felt alive because the relationships I’ve nurtured for the last 17-22 years were nurturing ME all weekend long with all the things money can't buy.
It's beautiful to feel how focused a group of people can genuinely be with one another.
Whether it was in our hotel rooms, drinking green juice at a cafe or meeting celebrities at the fancy parties, our conversation and connection, as it is other in all other times we're together, was balanced, honest, soulful and easy…
The dance experienced was great:
It went from one of us telling a story to someone else picking up where they left off…from one of us asking questions and listening, to another asking and listening…from positive, uplifting topics all the way through to a constant golden thread of generous laughter that came in long, loving streams; it was all flowing, elegant and fabulous.
Sure, I could focus more on the actual Oscars (OMG the Oscars!) and all the celebrities we met, however the real truth, gift and focus is this –> relationship. The gift of deep, fulfilling relating.
How much or how little are you doing this in business or in life?
Enter Relationship Architecture
Your ultimate self-expression, the biggest expression of you, can be found in the relationships you create and keep.
How?
Relationships, whether extremely good or challenging, give us the opportunity to be our most full, authentic and true self and it's this most fully-expressed self that your business needs to grow…
Your joy and greatest wealth and success in business lies in these genuine, human and heartful connections.
I love to call this focus becoming a “relationship architect.”
If you want to experience more happiness in your life and more engagement in your business, think about designing relationships and keeping relationships that nurture each of you equally.
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If you’ve reached out to an affiliate partner and they don’t write you back multiple times, let it go…move on to connecting with someone who is more suited to working and communing in a deep, human way with you.
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If you've been treating your community like a "list", always attempting to turn a connection into a sale, love up on them instead and give them true value, give of yourself in an unexpected, delightful way…
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If you have been writing your newsletter in a way that you think will “convert” vs. connect, scratch it and start again.
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If you’ve been thinking about money first, connection second, scratch that too and substitute humanity and some love. Love in business never hurts.
Here's the thing. Focusing on being a "relationship architect" is important because relationships grow you, and, in the end, that growth inside of you, grows the business.
Your self-expression and self-development are crucial for business growth.
How can you express the brand of woman you really are, how can you express your ultimate ALIVENESS throughout the relationships that make up your life and business.
Feel free to share your answer or any aha’s that came from this sharing on my Facebook wall: https://www.facebook.com/michelle.ghilotti.mandel. I'd love to hear from you and can't wait to continue the conversation…
Enjoy your business, enjoy your life! Love from La la land, where, in my corner, it's filled with lo lo love…
Life is good,
p.s. Until next time, #relationshipsarchitect on.
IGNITE 2014, Birmingham England