This is not a picture of the event I hosted last night. I’ll tell you about this photo in a minute, but for those of you who read about it when I posted yesterday, the very first Honora Evening Salon started and ended as I had envisioned it: a lovely, real, raw and moving event honoring our departed beloveds.
There was sound healing, meditation, song + more by the talented Nish Fox, then a sharing of writings I had asked everyone to prepare, storytelling + more…
What started out as an idea to honor my Mom, throw her a little birthday party (it was her day yesterday), grew into so much more.
What I shared with two clients today: when you have an idea that bubbles inside that’s so clearly aligned with the evolution of who you are today or of your work in the world, an idea that wants to GO, follow it. Don’t overthink or overjudge, just DO yourself a favor.
Because when you follow what’s meant to be (which is why it feels the way it does when it first lands in you), it does exactly that ~ the [super aligned] thing you started grows into more. Always!
One big thing that caught our attention last night and the real reason I’m writing is that of the women who were here honoring a person, a physical loss (there were various other types of loss present), 90% of them — of us — had lost mothers. Mothers.
This gets me all over again.
Seeing all the beautiful photos and one CA driver’s license of a sweet mama (-; on the altar was striking.
Most all of them.
Whether we had a good or a challenging relationship with her (or the person who was our main nurturer or mama figure), most in attendance would have agreed that you feel a lifeline being severed very much, no matter what.
I personally described it like a floating balloon. Untethered. Like –you can be in a room full of people or have a great, affectionate partner you live with or really enjoy the close bond between you and your child, but because your mother is no longer of this earth, you feel alone.
It’s a curious thing. I never thought that’s how I’d describe it, but it’s true, totally and completely real and true. We each agreed.
Ode to the importance of mothers or mother figures…to how important key nurturers are to our existence, both the physical, emotional and spiritual kinds of existence.
And not just parents, but true nurturers, those who are present with us, who work to understand us and our love language, parents who we’re creating new memories with, no matter how simple or small or how far apart those times physically come (or came), but always trusting they *would* come and bring about joy feelings.
Hearing the women speak so beautifully of their mothers last night was profound. It touched a part of my soul that will continue to live and mother even more aware tonight, tomorrow and tomorrow’s tomorrow…
This is a photo of Nolan and me the other afternoon.
We’ve been chatting a lot lately about what it means to be close and have a meaningful relationship in his teens and, really, throughout his life.
Our latest chats have, specifically, been about physical affection and following up seeing someone with loving eyes (those moments you’re filled with appreciation or love for someone) with showing them how you feel in a physical way, with affection.
A hand on the shoulder, a playful tickle (he’s good at those, though they’ve started to really hurt, love hurts), a hug…you know, not being afraid to complete the circle we so often don’t or didn’t when we were younger, because we thought it wasn’t cool or accepted.
I said there will be times (shh, they’re already here) where you’ll feel that you want to be affectionate with us (or anyone, really), but where your next decision will be not to do it.
Breakthrough that emotional barrier and just see how it feels to do what the initial love, kindness or closeness was moving you to do. (And this goes for us adults, too!).
It’s sweet — ever since we had this specific chat (there have been a few of them about affection now), he’s been more expressive physically. It’s like he gave himself permission to at least do that ~ to test it out. And keep testing.
This was us waiting in line to get him a burrito after school. There was a stool I sat on while we waited in line and as we stood there, he came over a couple steps and rested his head, his 13-year-old, I shave now head, on my shoulder.
We hugged for a good 15-20 seconds.
My heart melted, expanded, and created three new rooms and five new penthouse suites and I snapped this shot because I wanted to remember what conversation and playfulness does forever…
Make happiness your business by creating your authentic brand…enjoy your business, enjoy your life!
Life is good,
Success Designer, Brand Activator & Social Entrepreneur