My First Honora Salon (+ tip for you)

This is not a picture of the event I hosted last night. I’ll tell you about this photo in a minute, but for those of you who read about it when I posted yesterday, the very first Honora Evening Salon started and ended as I had envisioned it: a lovely, real, raw and moving event honoring our departed beloveds.

There was sound healing, meditation, song + more by the talented Nish Fox, then a sharing of writings I had asked everyone to prepare, storytelling + more…

What started out as an idea to honor my Mom, throw her a little birthday party (it was her day yesterday), grew into so much more.

What I shared with two clients today: when you have an idea that bubbles inside that’s so clearly aligned with the evolution of who you are today or of your work in the world, an idea that wants to GO, follow it. Don’t overthink or overjudge, just DO yourself a favor.


Because when you follow what’s meant to be (which is why it feels the way it does when it first lands in you), it does exactly that ~ the [super aligned] thing you started grows into more. Always!

One big thing that caught our attention last night and the real reason I’m writing is that of the women who were here honoring a person, a physical loss (there were various other types of loss present), 90% of them — of us — had lost mothers. Mothers.

This gets me all over again.

Seeing all the beautiful photos and one CA driver’s license of a sweet mama (-; on the altar was striking.


Most all of them.

Our lifelines.

Whether we had a good or a challenging relationship with her (or the person who was our main nurturer or mama figure), most in attendance would have agreed that you feel a lifeline being severed very much, no matter what.

I personally described it like a floating balloon. Untethered. Like –you can be in a room full of people or have a great, affectionate partner you live with or really enjoy the close bond between you and your child, but because your mother is no longer of this earth, you feel alone.

It’s a curious thing. I never thought that’s how I’d describe it, but it’s true, totally and completely real and true. We each agreed.

Ode to the importance of mothers or mother figures…to how important key nurturers are to our existence, both the physical, emotional and spiritual kinds of existence.

And not just parents, but true nurturers, those who are present with us, who work to understand us and our love language, parents who we’re creating new memories with, no matter how simple or small or how far apart those times physically come (or came), but always trusting they *would* come and bring about joy feelings.

Hearing the women speak so beautifully of their mothers last night was profound. It touched a part of my soul that will continue to live and mother even more aware tonight, tomorrow and tomorrow’s tomorrow…

This is a photo of Nolan and me the other afternoon.

We’ve been chatting a lot lately about what it means to be close and have a meaningful relationship in his teens and, really, throughout his life.

Our latest chats have, specifically, been about physical affection and following up seeing someone with loving eyes (those moments you’re filled with appreciation or love for someone) with showing them how you feel in a physical way, with affection.

A hand on the shoulder, a playful tickle (he’s good at those, though they’ve started to really hurt, love hurts), a hug…you know, not being afraid to complete the circle we so often don’t or didn’t when we were younger, because we thought it wasn’t cool or accepted.

I said there will be times (shh, they’re already here) where you’ll feel that you want to be affectionate with us (or anyone, really), but where your next decision will be not to do it.

Breakthrough that emotional barrier and just see how it feels to do what the initial love, kindness or closeness was moving you to do. (And this goes for us adults, too!).

It’s sweet — ever since we had this specific chat (there have been a few of them about affection now), he’s been more expressive physically. It’s like he gave himself permission to at least do that ~ to test it out. And keep testing.

This was us waiting in line to get him a burrito after school. There was a stool I sat on while we waited in line and as we stood there, he came over a couple steps and rested his head, his 13-year-old, I shave now head, on my shoulder.

We hugged for a good 15-20 seconds.

My heart melted, expanded, and created three new rooms and five new penthouse suites and I snapped this shot because I wanted to remember what conversation and playfulness does forever…

This love…

Make happiness your business by creating your authentic brand…enjoy your business, enjoy your life! 

Life is good,

Michelle Ghilotti
Success Designer, Brand Activator & Social Entrepreneur 

I Told My Husband No

We finally put away our Christmas decorations and as we were putting the gold reindeer away that greeted friends on the front porch (my Mom made them years back for our family home), Josh asked if I wanted him to throw away the poinsettias.

Funny enough, I had asked myself that question the day before. I was more pensive about it this year because we’ve never had poinsettias live this long.

Would I want to throw the plants that look like and feel like Christmas away because it wasn’t Christmas anymore? Or because neighbors might think we were late, lazy or not in timing with how things usually work?

I told him that I didn’t want to throw them away (and that I had asked myself that question yesterday) and had come to this answer, telling and/or helpful in other life situations, too: why would I throw something away that clearly has life in it still; that is alive and beautiful just because a particular season has passed?

We do this in our lives. We throw away a friendship because we believe a season has passed for that friendship to be able to continue to blossom. We don’t look for the spark, however small, to breathe life into it again. We get and stay busy and figure it’ll come back if it’s meant to. And though there are many relationships that understandably run their course for various reasons, many times, with more exploration, a smidge more curiosity or courageous conversation, we might realize that the friendship still has another nine lives in it and so much to teach both of us, not to mention much joy in it still, too.

We do that with who we are, too. With our identities. We throw away or ignore one of our primary talents — our life force — thinking that this talent or, maybe, more specifically, the dream tied to our talent was for another time, that it’s too late now…

Maybe worse, we pay who we really are beneath all of the societal layers and expectations little to no mind because we feel others or our industry [the box] won’t understand or accept it (or worse, that we won’t succeed). In other words, that we should play *within* the box because those around us won’t look kindly upon our striking (!) multi-faceted ways and are doing it this other way.

So, we toss…

We toss the friend, the possibility of an even better or deeper friendship and the possibility of an even better professional or creative life. And in doing so, we let a piece of our ultimate purpose, growth, healing, and happiness go.

What if every time we had the knee-jerk and rather impulsive reaction to throw something away, we knew that was the very moment we needed to keep it alive?

Make happiness your business by creating your authentic brand…enjoy your business, enjoy your life! 

Life is good,

Michelle Ghilotti
Success Designer, Brand Activator & Social Entrepreneur 

The Source of Life

The source of life lies in who and what we love.

Who do you love?

Who do you want to show love to more this year?

What do you truly love and how could you make it even more of your work this year?

Your joy, peace and success are worth all of it!

Make happiness your business by creating your authentic brand…enjoy your business, enjoy your life! 

Life is good,

Michelle Ghilotti
Success Designer, Brand Activator & Social Entrepreneur 

What My Family Says to Me MOST

When I say I’m going on a vision quest this Summer and they say yes (the youngest of the two with some reservation about my safety, but, ok mama, ok), when I say I’m going out on a date with myself tonight and they say yes, go, when I say I want to create a big event and do it in two months time (wait, the venue just pulled out with a month to go) and he says you can do it, yes, when I well up missing those who have passed and they *both* put a hand on my back without filling the space with anything but my feelings (yes), yes to these gorgeous men.

I feel their love and most of all, I feel how the ongoing decisive and unapologetic go ahead I give to myself is the spark they feed from as well.

As mom, wife, giver, nurturer or forgiver, we might sometimes feel that taking for ourselves takes away from this other thing we’re really good at, but the truth (that may or may not have been told to us by grandmother or mother) is that the more we step away to feast on what feels necessary for our full expression, the more everyone is given what they need to enjoy theirs.

It’s magical how that happens, but it does. Everyone gets what they need.

What do you need this year? How can you give it to yourself first then feel the support coming in from those around you?

Make happiness your business by creating your authentic brand…enjoy your business, enjoy your life! 

Life is good,

Michelle Ghilotti
Success Designer, Brand Activator & Social Entrepreneur